at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
Randomize
