actually, I'm a sock model
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
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