Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
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