Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
the raccoons are back...
Randomize