Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
Randomize
