Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
And my parents said I crawled through the house
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
Randomize