Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
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