So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
