Well apparently he's into motor boating.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
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