I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
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