if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
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