you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
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