need another drink. this is the easiest way
I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
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