i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize
