It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Randomize
