Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
Its about making memories worth repressing
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
Randomize
