I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
Randomize
