I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
