Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
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