swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
Randomize
