I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
Randomize
