the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
Randomize
