Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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