I cockslap morals
Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
