I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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