Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
I love having hate sex.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
Randomize
