I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
Randomize