Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
