are you still at the devil's house?
How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
He jacked off on my pillow when he found out I left. It was like coming home and finding that your dog, with separation anxiety, had pooped in your shoes. I think I'm flattered...
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
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