no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
I would ride that face into the sunset
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
