I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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