i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
Randomize
