Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
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