i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
Randomize
