so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
Randomize
