So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
Randomize