Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
You came home with a traffic cone and said, "this is my birthday condom."
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
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