I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
Randomize
