yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
Randomize
