I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
she pinky promised me she was 18
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
Randomize
