So I went home with some chick last night... I'm not sue what's worse: not getting a nut at 5am, the condom breaking and not being replaced, feeling poo when I put my finger in her but, sleeping on a heroin mattress in her living room, her swine flu coughing fit at 7am or realizing she peed the matt at 10am. Actually it was probably the fact that she continuously told me she was the classiest girl in boulder.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
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