I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
Randomize
