i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
You know what would have been funny if we got arrested last night? The inventory search of the lock box:\n\nContents:\n1 work ID\n1 33 round Glock magazine\n1 set of keys\n1 vibrator\n2 bags fruit snacks\n1 parking hang tag
Randomize
