I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize