did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
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