What a fucking waste of an outfit
I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
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