I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
I am mentally ready for anal.
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
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