So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
Randomize
