like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
Randomize
