There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
Randomize
