Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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